When Black Box is busted,
Then what can I trust in?
How to adjust,
And accept it, nonplussed?
How not to cuss?
Being calm is a must
But my mind’s not robust.
I should proudly discuss
All this science with gusto
But I’m just disgusted
When Black Box is busted.
I can’t understand it;
I stand empty handed,
with candid demands
To abandon, supplant it.
Black Box that I’m handed, the seed that you’ve planted
Should foster my mind to be grander, expanded.
But man, I feel stranded, I simply can’t stand it!
When I was a child, Black Box was the world.
And how it so gradually unfurled for this girl.
This detective still growing,
Found science mind-blowing
The journey of knowing,
Each pearl’s bestowing.
But now I confess:
I no longer feel blessed,
Just pressed, and stressed,
And under duress,
Forced to digest,
And keep up with the “best.”
I cannot digress;
There’s no rest in this quest,
this test to invest
but somehow get less.
I’m no longer impressed but rather obsessed.
And when yes, Black Box, you’re in a hot mess
I’m distressed by time’s relentlessness.
And magical science now loses its thrill,
My inquisitive will but remains, unfulfilled.
I cannot sit still until I’ve the skill
To rebuild Black Box -- with my confidence killed.
O, Black Box, how you come with a cost.
My time, my exhausted drive now lost.
But then a deep breath and a view anew,
And I see how I grew through engaging with you.
And how I’m a part of the lucky few,
Who feel their science…yet persevere too.
Who need to make every Black Box transparent,
Including themselves and the feelings inherent
That, as scientists, need to be made more apparent.
We shouldn’t be Black Boxes, and when we feel broken,
We need to come forth and to be more outspoken.
So Black Box, today, bring it on, I say
‘Cause I know it’s okay to feel this way.
When science evokes strong feelings – remember
That it is completely a HUMAN endeavor.
